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SO I GUESS IT WOULD PROBABLY be sorta like this place is so terrible and i feel terrible and this place is actually the worst and i'm probably too drunk or something and pretty loud i think i get pretty loud when i get pretty drunk and i think i maybe laugh too often and feel pretty ashamed at being a bit psyched on what a joke it is what a joke it all is but continue to push the bar the having an okay time despite it being a not-so-okay time bar and maybe you'll think that an okay time is what you'd like to have as well and come over to where i might be and say something like "you look like we have books or music or something in common" and i'd smirk sorta and say "yeah, 1994 screamo?" and you'd say "oh yeah, fuck you buddy, i'm sure you say that to all the girls" and i probably won't believe you but be pretty excited when you cite cap'n jazz and we smile super big together and yell really loud with fists clenched against chests "THIS WHOLE WORLD IS A WASTE OF MY TIME" and nobody else in the room would appreciate it so we'd laugh harder but the kinda laugh that is very strong so we'd smother our laughs in the other's personal space where neck and shoulders meet and i think "oh, how strange" and i expect you to say something really terrible and not what i want to hear like "oh, i've slept with the majority of the people you know" or "i'm sixteen" but instead you stand up straight and stretch and i do the same and hey wow you're shorter than me awesome and hey you haven't ran away yet so i assume i'm in the clear and i FAST FORWARD A FEW WEEKS AND we're hanging out in my bed maybe sorta naked watching season six of the simpsons because it has always been my favorite and it's probably your favorite too or maybe at least is now and maybe we kiss occasionally but laugh more frequently and it's pretty good we're both psyched on this arrangement and we're probably not having sex ever because i said once "can't have sex, sex steals souls and shit" and you probably maybe feel at least sort-of the same otherwise we wouldn't be in this situation and i blink and WE'RE PROBABLY SOMEWHERE having an okay time somewhere fine and it's okay great and probably something small and irrelevant happens and i decide at random that this whole thing is just silly and i'd rather be complaining somewhere so i won't call you back but at least you won't think of me as being too shitty when i accidentally cross your mind three years from now while watching basic cable.